31Mar
I know I’ve been slacking on this blog movement and I want to apologize. I receive so much kindness from others and often life overtakes my ability to appreciate it or pass it on.
Tonight on Plurk, a friend of mine dared his time line friends to post “The greatest thing about me is..” and then we had to finish the sentence in the rest of the post. Others were then to follow suit and put what they thought that persons best quality was.
What followed on my time line was pretty damned amazing. Several of us took his dare, me among them, and found what others saw in them. Things were revealed and appreciated that, at least for me, weren’t what I expected.
I was moved and surprised and lifted up by the things people found to value about me. Thanks, my friend, for daring each of us to be positive about ourselves and brave enough to toot our own horns a bit.
30Mar
So… Today was a big day for me. I weighed in for the first time in a month. I gained 7 pounds. Needless to say I was LESS THAN PLEASED. Yeah… that’s a nice way to put it. 7 pounds.. GAINED? Why are my clothes fitting looser on top? I do NOT comprehend how I gained 7 pounds while eating 2 meals a day… sometimes only one. IT’S NOT RIGHT MAN!
Today was also my second visit with my therapist. Apparently, I have issues with setting my boundaries and sticking with them. I tend to let people cross over what is acceptable to me and my limits because I value their happiness above mine… Yeah. I knew that actually. What I DON’T know is how to FIX the problem.
How do you force yourself to value… yourself? Why should you NEED to force that? Shouldn’t it be inherent? What’s defective in me that makes it NOT inherent? I seem to be left with more questions than I know how to answer… or… eve… focus on. I’m not good at babysteps but apparently… I’m going to have to learn how to be.
28Mar
God… Has it REALLY been 5 days since I last posted here?
Forgive me friends. I have a lot going on and a lot I can’t talk about. It’s kind of maddening really, because, I WANT to talk about it.
The best I can do is relay a conversation with Shecky…
S: Momma, has anyone ever told you what a great job you do as a Mom?
Me: Nope.
S: Well you’re doing a GREAT job! You’re the best mom EVER!
I know he won’t always feel that way… but it’s nice to hear that he does occasionally. Hehe
