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• Homeward Bound

  28Feb
  Categories: General Update Comments: 2

  I’m headed home. Vacation is OVER. Sigh. Time to go back to the real world. See you all on the other side Monday. Have a GREAT weekend!

• Guest Post from SociallyDistressed

  26Feb
  Categories: Blogger Archives Comments: 4

  **I am on vacation until March 1, 2009. Some of my dear friends have stepped up to the plate and regale you with their stories, thoughts, hearts and words. Today’s submission is from a friend of mine on Plurk. He is known there as SociallyDistressed. He is someone that inspires me to want to be a better parent and person. Y’all be nice and give him some comment love!**

  When Tessa asked me to write a guest post for her I almost said “No” because I didn’t think I’d have anything interesting to write. I don’t know why I was thinking this because I always have something to say whether it is interesting or not. So today I will give you a short glimpse into my world. A look at the hardships and rewards bestowed upon a single father living in a small city in New York.

  Twelve years ago, I was just finishing high school and looking forward to years of college that would hopefully culminate in a successful career later on. I looked around, saw split families all around me, and vowed that I’d never allow that to happen. Three years later, I’d finished my associates degree, was working full-time for an internet startup, and my daughter was born. I never in my life would have expected this before, and yet still wouldn’t have guessed that over the next 5 years I would be married to my daughter’s mother and divorced.

  My daughter will soon be 9, and I have now been divorced from her mother for nearly 4 years. During those 4 years, my ex has gradually neglected more and more of her responsibility for my daughter, and I have been there for my daughter to pick up the pieces. Even though my life today in no way resembles the expectations I had of myself in high school, I regret nothing.

  Instead of dwelling on the things that have gone wrong in my past, I have chosen to look to the present and future having no regrets. Through all of these past experiences I have learned, and through present experiences I continue to learn. The position I am in has presented me with opportunities to grow in ways I never could have had my adolescent dreams come true. I have become the better father and better person that I would not have become without this experience.

  I’m sure at this point some parents are now thinking of calling their lawyers to start the divorce, but before you do, let me assure you that glamorous picture of single parenting that I have painted above is only a small fraction of the whole story. In reality, I have spent hours weeping, weeks inside depressed, months arguing with my daughter’s mother. Being a single parent is very hard work, and involves plenty of frustration. Being a single father and working a full time job is nearly impossible.

  The reason I say single father, is perception. Through talking to teachers, other parents, friends, lawyers and many other people, I have come to the conclusion that people tend immediately suspect that men can’t handle being single fathers. I’m here to tell you that while it may be overwhelming at first, we can do it, and more men would if people would just show them some faith and support.

  So, the next time you see a single mother or father taking care of his or her child, give him or her a pat on the shoulder. You’re encouragement might just make a difference in the life of that person and the child.

• Guest Post from Miss Riss

  25Feb
  Categories: Blogger Archives Comments: 2

  **I am on vacation until March 1, 2009. Some of my dear friends have stepped up to the plate and regale you with their stories, thoughts, hearts and words. Today’s submission is from a friend of mine on Plurk. She is known there as MissRiss and she slays me with her goofy self over at her blog WildHair. We are SO sisters under the skin. Y’all be nice and give her some comment love!**

  I had written a different post for this blog. Then, after I sent it to Tessa, I felt like I cheated her and her readers of something really noteworthy. C’mon, AVOCADOS? Yes, I was inspired by the avocados I found in my fridge and wrote a blog post about them. That’s all fine and dandy for Las Tres Jockettes, but not for Not A Mean Girl’s blog! Cheese and rice!

  So, I hit the drawing board again and came up blank. I was trying too hard to be creative. What could possibly be something interesting enough for guest blogging? BAH!

  I ran through a gamut of ideas from my spectacular son to American Idol’s ridiculous new judging format. If you watch the program you know what I’m talking about. Thirty-six hopefuls go in; twelve come out on top. Ooh! Let me roll with that.

  Here’s how the elimination seems to work. For three weeks there will be three groups of twelve who perform on Tuesday. Then, America votes and NINE (9) contestants are dramatically told they didn’t make the cut. They aren’t awarded the honor to sit on the stools that possess an uncanny resemblance to metal bedpans on posts. Three contestants multiplied by three weeks = nine. I know. You’re thinking that can’t be right! That’s not TWELVE!! This is where the producers step in and allow the judges *cough* to decide who deserves a second chance by placing them in the top 12. It’s the WILD CARD! So, twelve singers compete. However, it’s only the top TEN who get to go on tour.

  I’m tired. How about you? Go get a drink and take a potty break. I can wait.

  Now, let me tell you I don’t really care who makes it to the numero uno position. My only stake in this is that I’m a snarker in regards to American Idol. What that means is that each Tuesday and Wednesday night I join a group of other witty and sarcastic people on Sean Daly’s Pop Life blog and we make fun of the judges, Ryan Seacrest and the slew of performers. We give credit where credit is due when a budding pop star emerges.

  Last year I was all googily eyed and drooling over Australian born contestant Michael Johns. He’s handsome and crooned soulfully. He was doinked far too early for my tastes. Shocking! As you all know, that faux hawk sporting, somewhat skeevy looking David Cook took home the Idol crown. No. I didn’t buy his CD. However, my ‘Roo (the name I affectionately call Michael Johns) is due to have a release in May. I’ll be quick to snatch up that CD.

  This week’s American Idol was chocked full of glitches and it seemed more like the first year of competition than the 8th season. Twelve of the thirty-six contestants sang their selected tune. Much like the knight told Indiana Jones to “choose wisely” when he was perusing various chalices in THE LAST CRUSADE … contestants are told their song choice is crucial. It’s a make or break moment. Most of them chose poorly and were sent into the abyss of namelessness. It’s a dark and lonely place, I would imagine.

  The bright spot in the train wreck was the return of my ‘Roo and Carly Smithson (I could have done without her attempts at being Nancy or Ann Wilson — I get them confused.) Anyway, they sang “The Letter.” Again, I wish it had been a solo performance by my Aussie boyfriend.

  Confession: I screamed to loudly when Michael Johns came on the Idol stage that both cats shot out of the room and my son looked at me with great horror. I hadn’t squealed like that since seeing Donny Osmond in concert and he broke into “Puppy Love.”

  Back to the matter at hand….
  While the dramatic and often psychotic 6 year old antics of Tatiana Del Toro failed to woo, or more likely scare them into voting, America declined her reappearance. I’m sure she’ll be back after the judges are told she makes good TV and producers insist on her return during the wild card selection.

  For now, the first week results gave us Danny Gokey (he’s the widower who looks like Robert Downey Jr’s brother ), Alexis Grace (she sports blond hair with pink high-lights — how original– and is a mommy) and Michael “Big Oil” Sarver (he’s a meaty married dude who is cute-ish.

  There ya go. I want to thank Not A Mean Girl for asking me to guest blog. I was so excited that I immediately said yes. I hope she’ll have me back again.